Survival working with "Survivors" of abuse

I don't know, but some days after answering a ton of emails from survivors or victims of sexual abuse can trigger my own stuff..which is normal, to an extent. The ongoing question is always"What do you do with it?"

Some days I find myself becoming increasingly irritated with my husband or my 9 y/r daughter, which is of course not their fault..even if they can be a little irritating at times:)

I head off to my "sacred space" as I teach my women on my site, and I fight to have my "private time". My meditation time is truly sacred to me. My time of prayer and time to get "centered". So many days I can feel "off kilter" if that is a word. Like I am running sideways. I know it is time to get centered when I am driving and suddenly I feel a strong urge to play bumber cars with the car ahead of me who just happens to be driving incredibly slow. I think "what's the worst that could happen? a few bumps and bruises?"
Luckily, I come back to reality and realize that my thinking just "might" be a little scewed at the moment.

I learned to recognize the signs of stress and burnout many years ago..and in fact, used to teach it to young nurses and colleagues.

The problem is, I think, that when you get out on your own, say in private practice, you are no longer surrounded by professionals or friends that can pull you aside and tell you face to face when you start to get a little crispy around the edges. So, the questions remains, how do you recognize the stress getting out of control in your life when you are on your own?

Well, I have a few ideas that I use, usually, but bear in mind, we are not perfect beings and we all make mistakes, but following some of these guidelines will help your chances of not burning out.

Take time every day to relax via meditation, reading, walking, exercise etc,
Make time to spend with your family
It is good to have alone time..but not too much. You must be careful not to isolate yourself.
Remember, you can NOT save the world.(I fall into this category)..but you can certainly help people to save themselves.
There are going to be people you can't help..don't take it personally. A person has to be willing to change.
You are no good to other people if you are not good to yourself!

This my short list and I am sure that you can add tons of others..but this works for me. When I start neglecting myself..my life becomes off balance.

I certainly don't have all of the answers..but I do know that I try the best that I can..and that is the best that I can do..and that has to be enough!

Becky Herdmann
www.soul-expressions-abuse-recovery.com