Hello to all my new friends at Startup Biz!

Following is a reprint that I first did back in December of 2008 at Better Networker.

I have received an overwhelming amount of spam when I first joined Startup Biz and I'm about to puke or maybe just leave.

If you really want to set yourself apart from everybody else do something nobody else is doing (or at least what very few are doing) and that is to actually create a friendship or relationship before you cram your opportunity down my throat.

Dan Jensen and a few others in this community have established that relationship with me here so far and haven't even mentioned their business to me at all.

This is my policy as well... I don't even talk to anyone about my business unless they ask me about it.

You might wonder how I stay in business with this approach. Well, if you're really curious, it simple, just ask me.


I was so pleased with how one of the comments I posted to somebody else's article came off my fingertips that I thought I'd like to expand on it and share it with the community.

You've got to check out Juanita Waterman and Cynthia & James Johnson. They are full of wisdom about this point that I'm talking about. I'm sure that there are probably thousands who understand it, and way too many who really don't.

I know. I used to be one and totally objectified people for what they could do for me. It makes me feel yucky just to think about it.


If you insist on making them "your" anything, make them your friend.

People want to be appreciated for who they are, not for how they fill your pockets.

Imagine walking down the street past a bunch of strangers, one of them grabs you and starts to make out with you.

I'm sure your first impression will be to reach for your wallet and stuff a few bills in their pocket.... NOT! How gross! How disrespectful too.

I think trying to sell anything to a perfect stranger is just like that. Walking down the street and making out with a perfect stranger. It's more than strange, it's gross!

Embarrassingly enough I used to be like that. Matter of fact, I'm very newly in recovery. (not the making out with strangers part...)

Just like Juanita, I'm embarrassed that I ever looked at a person as an animated piece of currency. Like I said before, it's gross!

My thanks go out to people like you Juanita, Cynthia and James who are helping to open my eyes and not only see other people for who they really are, but me too.

Honestly, we all can be so much better than that.

How much nicer does it feel to make a friend under no pretense, find out that there's some great apples down the street, and let them know that the apples really are good.

You walk past the apple vendor one day and he tells you how much he appreciates you telling your friends how good his apples are and he gives you a whole case just because he appreciates you.

Is that a cheesy example? Maybe, but I think you can probably feel the difference between that and making out with some stranger that has the apples in his mouth and would like to share them with you rather aggressively.

Just don't do it. It's gross!

Your Friend Forever, Randy

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