"The Working Mom--Balancing Your Yin and Yang"

Working mothers often ask the question, "how can I do everything?” The answer is you cannot do EVERYTHING. Better yet, you really should not have to do everything. When I accepted this realization, I found peace knowing that I am not Superwoman, and most of all, Superwoman is a myth and a figment of the so-called modern woman's imagination.

Even if you have a great support system and a mate that helps you along the rough roads of being a working mom, you still cannot do everything. This does not mean you cannot do all things. It is a matter of pacing yourself and putting your life in perspective.

The key for me is prayer, organization, prioritizing and realizing when to say "no." Only you know, as a working mother, what is most important to accomplish and what should take precedence in your life. Moreover, only you can determine how much you can take, before you have an emotional and physical meltdown.

Another important item is having balance. You must have a balance of work and play. If all of your time is a wave of "do, do, and do" and you do not set time for "you, you, you" you will eventually burnout. You have to have outlets. Get a hobby, pamper yourself, and make time to do YOU! Your purpose in life is not to be a workhorse. Time is precious, life is a gift and we need to treat them both as such.

Here are some quick methods I advise my working mom clients to incorporate in their lives:

• Keep a list of what you have to do and when it needs to be completed. Break everything down on a daily, weekly and monthly basis, as well as by time and priority.

• Set limits for yourself. Do not try to plan all of your tasks for the same day. Spread things out over a period, based upon when items are due.

• Be flexible. Things come up and priorities can change. So, be open to any changes that may occur.

• Try to delegate task to others. You can even give small household chores to your child/children. Not only does this free you up, but it also teaches them responsibility.

• Know when to say NO! You cannot be everything to everybody, and you cannot be in two places at the same time. So, say no to those things that have not significant value to you or to others because you cannot devote to the task.

• If you can, hook up with a family-oriented organization, or even network with a couple of mom's in your neighborhood. Take turns car-pooling the kids to school, babysitting for each other and taking care of similar "mom" duties. I firmly believe in the African proverb, which states: "it takes a village to raise one child"...so, find a village.

• All work and no play will make you a serious bore with no life. Make fun time for you and the family

• Most of all, set aside fun time for you. You have to find "me" time. Whatever you do to pamper yourself, you should schedule it in to your plans.
  
  

Earlier in my article, I stated prayer is a tool that I use. Personally speaking, I have found that prayer and meditation can make a big difference, especially in your perception and your attitude. Praying gives me focus and helps me keep my life in perspective. I highly recommend incorporating prayer or some form of meditation in your life. It is a great stress reliever and it is a way to have quiet time just for you.

Career Coaching Exercise:

• What are the life roles that you are having trouble balancing?
  
• What can you eliminate from your schedule to make more time for you?
  
• Do you have “energy” thieves in your life, if so, what and/or who are they? How are you going to get rid of those energy thieves?

Affirmation:

"Life is too short and living is too long to be stressed out over what I cannot control."