What Are The Proper Social Netiquette For "Unfriending" - To Tell Or Not To Tell

For some months now I have been studying some "friends" of mine in the social networking arena and I am seriously thinking if it is good to keep them as friends or not.

However, to do that, I need to consider the proper etiquette or netiquette to go about it.

1. Unfriending with a notice: If the person I am considering unfriending is someone whose behavior online does not go well with me, then it is proper etiquette to send them a note explaining why I would be ending the friendship with them online.

2. Unfriending for privacy: Assuming you accepted friendship with a colleague, family member, co worker or boss and you later felt you need to keep your private activities away from them, it is also proper etiquette to let them know that you would rather keep the connection with them off line.

3. Unfriending without notice: You have every right to unfriend anybody without notice if the person is not active and hardly responds to your messages. Since they are not making the friendship mutually beneficial, you can quietly unfriend them and concentrate on those who appreciate your friendship and continuous contact.

...So now, I can move on and check why I want to unfriend those people and use the right etiquette.

Have you unfriended anyone before? How did you go about it? I would love to hear your story!

Don't be a victim to this issue! Download my free report which reveals some proper social netiquette to boost your credibility and to attract quality friends.

Click on the link to get your FREE Social Netiquette Report!

Share This Page

Next Page of Member Blogs >

Add a Comment

You need to be a member of StartUp to add comments!

Join this Ning Network

Comment by Laila on August 18, 2009 at 8:16am: As usual, Marjorie, your post has covered the topic well. I have done all the things that you mentioned - and I usually do let people know right away what behavior will get them removed or blocked (I.E. sending me SPAM, old jokes, "good luck" chain letters)

I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but there are soooo many people who think that just because you accepted their friend invite, they can fill up your inbox with their "offers"!

To reduce the influx of spam, I usually go to the persons page and leave them a note...if they don't respond, I KNOW that they are just sending out ads to anyone who will read them, and not reading anything that anyone writes to them...so I don't click 'accept'.

Thanks for this post, Marjorie - maybe some of them will learn something :)
Laila
www.greenMOMteam.com

Comment by Marsha S Bowersock on August 17, 2009 at 11:47pm: Great issue to bring up, not just everyone considers the proper way to do anything anymore.
Sad but very true

Comment by T.M. Carr on August 17, 2009 at 9:15pm: I think this is a valid issue that is good to be addressed generally i TRY TO WARN people of the behaviors that are making me want to unfriend them, if they do not adjust I may then threaten to unfriend. If they persist with no compromise then You've been left with no choice and no further notice is needed. As for privacy, I try to think of that ahead of time, but there is no true privacy on the web, but for the general public there are measures one can take to offer themselves more privacy. Especially now that social networks are making privacy more customizable to users. Still there comesd a time when it is just not wise to maintain some connections, usually in those cases for me the situation is so unsalvagable that there is no longer a need for subtlety, e.g. if someone is spying and backbiting on you or stealing your pics,ideas, they are not worthy of your respectable practice. Still if the situation is not that dramatic and its merely a matter of impropriety, or someone who does not fit your agenda being too close to your personal web water cooler(and you don't want them asking questions about it, then an alternative might be to let them know that you are making important changes to your site and that their connection to it is no longer appropriate, If you know that they will have an issue with this news you explain that your not at a stage in the change where you can adequaitely describe what it's about and that your uncomfortable explaining it to them anyway for the same reasons that its no longer appropriate that they have access to the profile. Additionally you could try to offer them a new connection to something more appropriate, (like maybe dust off that old facebook account you made and never used and offer to add them.) If all of that would not be the truth and you are uncomfortable lying to the persons then maybe it's just time either be honest with them even if it means a confrontation, or simply disconnect without any fanfare. Just disappear. The connection may have been imbalanced anyway with them having to much entitlement to your inside operations,you not having enough alpha waves to create boundaries or a little bit of both, Hence definitely Time to hit the reset button on that friendship.
If you like my response please post it somewhere important or related to this survey! Thanks!

Comment by Pet Lovers Paradise on August 17, 2009 at 3:29pm: Unfortunately, I have had to "unfriend" a lot of folks. Generally speaking, I have "unfriended" without notice as the individual is not really a "friend" and wouldn't notice if I blocked their messages as a whole. Interesting discussion and appreciate the information.